Over the years I’ve heard people say, “I don’t care”. A good friend recently told me that he didn’t care what people thought. I thought it was silly for someone of his intelligence to come across with such a myopic attitude, but OK, whatever. He said he liked people, he just didn’t care about their opinions. He’s a good friend and I get him. We just process differently. Another person told me they didn’t care about me or what I thought. Hmm, that’s pretty cold. My rebuttal… then why are you talking to me? If you literally do not care, then why in the world are you wasting one millisecond of your glorious life to show me ANY attention.
It’s almost hysterical to me, if not extremely sad (seriously), when someone tries to impress upon me their intentionality of not caring. The thing is, it’s weak. It’s weak in the sense that “not caring” is just too easy. It takes no energy. This is certainly debatable, especially for a feeler like me with whom caring is a natural tendency, but as I think about it more, it still takes energy to care, in my opinion.
The thing is, I don’t always care what people think, but I don’t feel the need to exude this pithy, sometimes arrogant, opinion upon them. It’s rude, it’s weak, it’s (a bit) cold, and anyone can do it. Congratulations to them for not caring. I want them to try caring for a person when they (themselves) have absolutely no binding to that person’s judgement, then tell me how much they don’t care. You see, it’s easy to “not care” when someone feels like there is nothing in it for them, but the moment they need something, all of the sudden caring is a real thing. All of the sudden it means something to them. They flip.
I also don’t remember a time when caring hurt someone. It’s a low risk, high reward emotion that requires zero human interaction. Caring is inside us, which is what makes it real. The moment it’s put into action, it’s something else, but caring dwells within our souls, in the spiritual realm.
It’s very hard for me to express what I’m thinking sometimes, so if you are reading this and you are confused as to the point I’m trying to get across, let me just say this: If you don’t care and have no desire to care, that is fine. If that is your personality, that is legit. I buy that. But… don’t act like “not caring” is some great thing you’ve worked hard at or some fascinating feat you’ve achieved, because I don’t buy it and neither do a lot of other people. It’s just too easy. I’m sorry, but I’m not impressed.
I know only a very small number of people will relate to what I’m saying. Others may simply disagree. Some will likely be utterly confused. That’s fine. LOL. My hope is it will open up a new vantage point where you can at least consider another perspective. That’s really how most of my writings are intended anyway.